WB, j'écoute

Remember when we showed you this?


Girl, you got it.

Thank you for listening.

First of Fall

It's finally autumn almost everywhere in the northern hemisphere but Baltimore - it's only a balmy 30 degrees celsius today in Baltimore. Still, even here, south of the Mason-Dixon line, drop in temperatures or not, the arrival of the fall equinox means the cultivation of the Fall Wedding alongside the abundant crop.

Among these are Fall Weddings Done Well.

This is an outdoor venue:


and these are great flower arrangements:


This:


that turns into this in the evening:


is the way to throw a party.

These are genuine seasonal bouquets and contemporary and flattering bridesmaids dresses in a fall-appropriate palette:


These are trendy shoes on every bridesmaid (for the sake of consistency):


This is grey-and-aubergine as God intended:

This is an appropriate cake and cake set-up:


Finally, this is a bride who, though her dress tends toward the snooze-fest, at least knows her accessories:


Charming. I am charmed.

Fall brides reading: just remember - you reap what you sow ... and that's not always a bad thing.

Wait. No roses?

Someone FINALLY understood what it means for a bouquet to "match" your bridesmaids' dresses, without being "matchy-matchy".

+ 8 points for choosing an absolutely lovely bridesmaid bouquet. I love the color and the flowers of choice! I am in a state of utter shock that there exists a bride who did not use roses for her girls' bouquets.

- 2 points for that atrocious ribbon. Simply unnecessary. Why must it be white? And why must in hang down in such an offensive (a gift-like) fashion?

+ 2 points for the color of the dresses.

- 3 points for the fit, fabric and folds! Such a pretty color gone wasted on such a boring and predictable (straight-cut and floor length) style of dress. I can only assume that the bride was going for "simple and understated", but she ended up with a snoozefest.

Close. Oh-so-very.

Hate. Plain and Simple.

Euf.

Where do I even begin?

Hate the cut.

Hate the color.

Hate the fabric.

Hate the shawl.

Hate the bouquet.

And while we're at it...

Hate the pose.

Hate the photographer.

And don't even get me started on the bride's ridiculous looking veil....

Sorry wedding party. But I kinda hate it ALL.

Lovers' Quarrel

Now. Dissent among the troops is SO uncommon here at WB. I mean, let's face it: celia and I are like Ulysses and Diomedes burning in the same flame in the extreme depths of Dante's hell ... and we LIKE it like that. But every now and then, someone throws a stick in the spokes of our (new) wheels, and this happens:

Alan Maudie photography: what are your thoughts on this?

CCB: LOVE it.

celia: HATE it.

CCB: WHAT? Why?

celia: WHAT? How?

CCB and celia: The green vests! The paisley ties! The green vests and the paisley ties together!

celia: oy

CCB: We COMPLETELY disagree on this one.

celia: I LOVE that we do.

CCB: How could you hate this? It's so fun and fresh and original!

celia: This looks like a crazy-house to me.

CCB: That's precisely what I like about it. My ONLY issue is that maybe it's a little much with all the flowers ... even though the boutonniers are kind of adorable and I'm totally in love with these centerpieces.

celia: Ok. These centerpieces are SUPER cute! The tin planters are the best part. And the boutonniers are solid.

CCB: Alright, so we don't disagree on life yet. Promising.

celia: Phew.

Weigh in today - hate it or love it?

Something Blue

Monochrome bouquet, done well:

Pretty, unexpectedly classic.

5 points.

Matching (but not overly matchy) boutonniers:

3 points.

Total: 8

Take it. Be happy with it. Be grateful that we're not taking points away for this:

Closer, Let me Whisper in Your Ear ...

CCB: I found another one.

celia: Another what?

CCB: Oh, you'll see ...

celia: Ah. One of THESE.

CCB: Do you see what I mean?

celia: Boresville ....

CCB: It's not even that. I mean, whatever, ok, the dress is boring, but it's safe, at least. It's really this that I can't stomach.

celia: No one should have to shoulder that burden. Don't feel bad about it.

CCB: But it makes me so sad when they don't listen to us ...

celia: I know ...

CCB: Didn't we warn them about sleeves and boleros (even though this one has a fun collar)?

celia: We did ...

CCB: And didn't we explain to them how to do monochrome white bouquets?

celia: We did that, too.

CCB: Didn't we spend an ENTIRE EPIC GUIDE explaining it?

celia: oy. I see where this is going ...

CCB: Please pardon my vent, but I'm really frustrated right now. This is a failure of unacceptable proportion.

celia: I know. But it's not our fault - we're good teachers.

CCB: We are.

celia: Some kids just don't study.

CCB: I guess you're right.

celia: They can't all be wedding- planning heroes like we are ...

CCB: No. They certainly can't.

and Miami Makes Three

Florida has been having a good (and sometimes bad, but on the whole, acceptable) month. To wit, the third of an unplanned series on The South and the Things it Does Well.

Exhibit C: BM dresses

We LOVE these dresses. We love everything about them: the length, the double (complimentary) fabric, the draping, the originality. In short: they are wedding-appropriate and contemporary without feeling like cocktail dresses.

Some girls went awry with footwear and accessories. Black shoes? Really? A choker or chunky silver necklace dangling a heavy silver heart? ... not so much.

The near-identical pink in the lily bouquets do give a "matchy-matchy" effect to the whole ensemble, but not so egregious that it takes away from the look, when executed well (as below).

Miami, that's hot. WB approves.

(Luke)warm Palette

Although it was eons ago, some of you may remember our post "Pop, Quiz, Hotshot" and the bride who (indirectly and unwittingly) submitted her wedding photos for our evaluation. You've been waiting for another pop quiz. We know it. We feel it. Well, wait no more.

In our most recent "Pink" post, you learned how NOT to do the girliest colour of all-time. We love it when our readers listen to us, which is why we more or less commend you, bride, on your incorporation of prototypical femininity on your big day. See:

Your bridesmaids' dresses are more or less the same colour as the ones in our previous post, only their flowers, rather than being an attempt at "matchy-matchiness," delve into the orange that will become a larger part of your overall scheme later on. Solid.

We like that your reception revolved around a family of related colours happily married. We like the peach tablecloths and the pink gerber daisies, if only because they are so nicely held together by the hanging chinese lanterns.

We appreciate that your parents didn't try to mirror each other exactly or disappear in the wedding party: we like a tasteful print on a MOB, and full-length florals are all the rage this season. We question the coordination (with anything other than your mother's dress) of the yellow boutonnier on your father, but we generally approve of this look.

We commend your effort to include some punchy colour in your own ensemble: the ruby in your necklace (which we like as a stand-alone piece -- well done) picks up perfectly the gamut of pinks in your bouquet, and jazzes up a dress that otherwise falls rather flat (sorry).

Overall, we think you've done well, but we would have liked to see you take a few more chances with your construct as a whole. If you are going to go pink in the way you went pink, you kind of have to commit to a certain level of ridiculous-contemporary of which we only see glimpses.

It is difficult, indeed, to harmonise the traditional with the more modern, and you gave it a solid try - we aren't even offended by the beige suit on your groom given your countryside venue. We give you a healthy 80% for presentation and overall vision.

Pas pire, hotshot.

Pink, as the bing on your cherry.

Pink:

The color of love. (puke)

The color of passion. (barf)

The color that some brides just can't seem to avoid. (sigh)

Many girls love the color pink. That's fine. But just because you think it's pretty, does not make it an appropriate color theme for your wedding.

The color pink has to be done very carefully and thoughtfully. One wrong move, and your wedding could end up looking like Barbie's funhouse - not cute.

Take this wedding. It's not even that the bride went that overboard on the pink. I'm sure it could have been a lot worse. The problem here is that there was absolutely no sense of cohesiveness. You cannot simply use every shade out there and assume it'll work just because it's "pink". Let's take a look:

The wedding party :

There isn't anything too offensive about the bridesmaid's dress. Hell, I think the Bride may have even been reading WB's Bouquet Guide when choosing her flowers (pretty!). But that shade of fuchsia may be just a few shades too bright, that when paired with that fabric, ends up looking tacky. Also, the pink and black tie on the groomsman is completely off. And, let's be honest, a little on the ugly side. And, is he waving?? Unacceptable.

The table of honor:

The MOH's dress seems pretty, but that soft pink (unfortunately) clashes with all the other shades bastardized at this wedding. The cake is also quite awful - both in color and construction (the ribbon looks Barbie pink). And are those gifts wrapped in pink and BROWN? What does brown have to do with anything?

The music:

I don't care if you're the best wedding DJ in town (does that even exist?), that setup is atrocious! And kinda sleazy.

The guests:

I assume the DJ/MC forced these get-ups upon the guests. At least the men got to wear florescent green. Not pictured: each hat came paired with color coordinated sunglasses. (Also, have you not read the WB post about how wedding guests don't really want to participate).

Oh pink. Because you are so very...

No, no, no, no, no

Michelle: Yo, B, we's been dancin' for hours. Can I take off my shoes?
Beyoncé: What? No, Michelle. No you canNOT take off yo' shoes. We got a video to shoot.
Kelly: But B, it's like that time we were at that wedding where, by the time we got to da conga-line, the bridesmaids was so spent they just put on they flip-flops ...


Beyoncé: No, no, no, no, no
Kelly: But it's really yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah?
Beyoncé: No, I'm sayin' NO, no, no, no, no


Michelle: But it's really yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah?
Beyoncé: Gurrl, now you just actin' a fool. Dass da same wedding where the bridesmaids was wearin' two-piece tube dresses and holdin' cheap flowers.


Michelle: But my feet hurt.
Beyoncé: Do you WANT to be a superstar or not? (to herself): I swear, one day, imma go solo on these bitches ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYEqt29MEgQ

Can You Feel the Love Tonight?

Bride: Alright girls, let's talk dresses.
BMs: Ok.
Bride: You know what I haven't seen in the past decade and that I think would be a nice throwback to 2000, when Johnny and I met?
BMs: No, tell us.
Bride: TWO-PIECE DRESSES.
BMs: NICE!
BM1: I think I might still have mine from prom.
Bride: Really? What does it look like?


BM1: Well, it's short, because I was pretty rebellious in those days, and the skirt is like a chiffony thing in sage, but the top is ... wait for it ... TWO-TONED!
BM2: Two-toned? Seriously? Was one of them sage?
BM1: No! Peach and cream - I was clever like that.
BM2: Of course.
Bride: How did you keep the continuity with the skirt, then?
BM1: I added a little green bow around the waist. It looked nice.
Bride: Ok. Done and done. Any dissent from the peanut gallery?
BM2: Well, I don't know ... I mean, seriously? Like, sage is not my best colour but I'm willing to live with it. But are two tones even necessary in the bodice?
Bride: I'm trying to save us all a little money. Mary already has her dress ...
BM2: Ok, ok, fine.
BM3: Plus, this way, we get to wear each part over and over again. Like you can just wear the skirt again if you want ... or just the bodice.
BM2: Right. That's very likely to happen.
BM4: You know what else I was thinking?
Bride: What?
BM4: If we are going to go with a prom theme, we might as well use organza ribbons to keep the bouquets together.


Bride: Oh my God, I LOVE that idea. You know what really ticks me off, though?
BM3: What?
Bride: My fiancé's mother is insisting on wearing a spiderweb over her dress. It's gonna ruin all our pictures.


BM3: You can't talk her out of it?
Bride: I tried. No luck.
BM3: It's ok. At least we'll all look nice.

Pop Quiz, Hotshot

Dear WB,

I have been a faithful reader for months, so when it came time for me to plan my special day, you, most naturally, were my very first point of reference. I thought I might submit some pictures to you for some feedback on how I did at following "the rules" (but not in a "What not to Wear" kind of way). Would you mind having a look and getting back to me?

Many thanks,
Hellenic Bride

------------------------------------

Dear Hellenic Bride,

Many thanks for your faithful readership! celia and I are most glad to critique (constructively) your look. Here goes ...


We see a number of things here. First, an asymetric cut to your gown, a lightly feathered strap with matching rhinestone work in the bodice, and a neutral bouquet - all things we have advocated in recent months. Good work on picking up on these neo-basics and making them yours. We don't know you at all, so we can't say what kind of person you are, but we would have liked to see you go a little bigger with these decisions - a *little* more drama in the strap, for example, would have done the trick.

Permit us to ask: who tailored your gown? We hope you didn't pay them terribly much.

Also, although we commend your decision to stick to a white bouquet, we wonder if you are actually holding asparagus. Is your bouquet made of asparagus? That's kind of what it looks like. I mean, kudos if you were going for originality - edible arrangements are all the rage these days. But, seriously? Asparagus? If you must incorporate it at all, save it for the centerpiece, girl.


A feathered headpiece? NOW we're talking! We love its strategic placement and its coordination (without being matchy-matchy) with the feathered strap. Well-done!


We also appreciate what you've done with your hair. We love a classic side-sweep that does not throw us back to 1994. (Well, to be honest, we love it even then).

In general, Hellenic Bride, it looks like you have opted for the nebulous middle-ground between strictly traditional and flashily contemporary. We think you've done well overall: 85%

Looking forward to friendly referrals,
WB

Birds of a Feather Flock Together

Yes yes, ok, fine. You've seen a lot of "feathery business" on here lately, and maybe you're annoyed. Well guess what? Our celebrity guest contributor, Jen Watson, is NOT. In fact, she's sent in a whole gaggle (by google) of images from a recent wedding that employed the feather-flower 1-2 punch to maximum effect. Have a gander:


This, dear readers, is a real-life example of what we have referred to (just in our last post) as a "fearless bride." Texture. Pattern. Variety - a mixed media bouquet, all within classic, earthy tones. Let's have a closer look:


What more could you possibly ask for, you ask?

The same thing applied to the bridal party.

But wait, it doesn't stop there. This bride brought her floral theme full-circle by applying it to the groom. Why leave your man out while you have all the fun? Every bird does, after all, have not one but two wings.

We love it. Many thanks to Jen for this exceptional find, and well-done, bride!

Color me...

You've seen our Guide to White Bouquets, so we thought it was only fair to share our thoughts on bouquets of the colored variety.

Intrigued?

Read on.

A Guide to Colored Bouquets

by: WB

DO mix it up! Want to stick with the same type of flower? Well then choose a few shades of color to work with. Afraid of using too much color or too much of that flower? Well then spice things up with a variety of flowers!

DO try and embrace some bright colors! Just because you're getting married, doesn't mean the only color palette you can use involves pastels. This bride's wedding was in October, so she chose autumn-friendly tones of orange, yellow and red. How lovely!

Summer wedding? DON'T be afraid to use some darker hues! Sure this bouquet has a variety of flowers AND colors, but when it all works so well together, who could object?

DON'T be boring!! Even if you decide to stick with a one-color/one-flower bouquet, you can still keep it interesting. Feathers! Buttons! Stripes! Bows! Don't be afraid to show a little character, Brides! Or, you will likely just put your guests to sleep with your predictability. No one wants that.

But please, DON'T overdo it! You don't want to seem like a boring bride, but you don't want to give your guests a seizure either. Are those ribbons I see? Was there an Awful Bouquet contest to be won?

DON'T get stuck in the 80s. No matter how many times your mother tells you that V-shaped cascading rose bouquets are "classic", don't listen. She is dead wrong. And probably just reminiscing about her own wedding.

And on on the topic of roses, DON'T opt for the usual red rose bouquet. Been there, done that. Oh, I see, you want to seem a little more original by adding "diamond" studs? How predictable. I'm still grossly unimpressed by your efforts, Bride.

Moral of the story: Fun and original = good. Boring and dreary = bad. But at the same time, try and stick to a theme - choosing either a specific flower or color. No one wants a train-wreck bouquet. Or do they?

Still not sure what is right for you? Let's take a look at a few examples:

For the Traditional Bride:

Soft colors, rich textures, and an intriguing arrangement. A bouquet can be classic, yet still interesting and youthful.

For the Dramatic Bride:

Want to make a statement? Not afraid of a little black? Is Vivienne Westwood your idol? Then this calla lilly bouquet is for you! Incredibly chic and gorgeously dramatic.

For the Fearless Bride:

Colors! Feathers! Pearls! Borderline offensiveness! You don't care. If it's different, you want it. So show those roses-toting brides a thing or two, with this feathered masterpiece!

For the Bride Who needs to Keep her Hands Warm

So you're having a winter wedding. And you want a bouquet AND a fur hand muff...at the same time. Compromise? Never! Just get yourself the innovative Hand Muff Bouquet, and get ready to throw any taste you may have left, right out the window!

For the Bride Who loves Valentine's Day...a lot

Don't you just love hearts? They're just so....romantic! And isn't your wedding day supposed to be about romance and love!? Well then it's only obvious for you to have a heart shaped bouquet! Who cares if the guests gag in your face each time they lay their eyes on the atrocity in your hands? You're in love! And you want to show it! With flowers! (puke)

For the Bride Who has Lost her Mind

Why of course you want an Ardene- inspired beaded bouquet! I mean, nothing is better suited for your blue trimmed dressed! Although, something is definitely missing in this picture....Ah yes. Elbow length gloves. Also to be found at Ardene's. One-stop shopping for our crazy (albeit lovable) Bride!