Adventures in Overkill

Ah yes.

The Art of Overdoingit.

While there some brides who bore me to tears, there exists another subset of brides who seem to want to do it all. While doing it all wrong.

Whatever do I mean?

Let me give you some visuals to work with.

Exhibit A:

Purple and Yellow. Yellow and Purple. Paired with the stiffest and most uncomfortable looking fabric ever. This is so matchy-matchy, my eyes are actually crying purple and yellow tears. And yet - do these shades even match? And what is up with all the different types of bouquets? Are those two MOHs? Why is that child holding a purse? Oh god. Is she a junior bridesmaid (let those words never be seen or spoken again)? This bride tried so hard to be cohesive that her bridal party just ended up looking like one hot mess.

Exhibit B:

This has to be a joke, right? I mean all those pleats. And silver. And sequins. And wind. Why, bride? Why? I think I would flat-out kill my wedding photographer if he would even suggest such a heinous pose. Also, I'm pretty sure the MOH got her fan at one of the stands they have outside of the Vatican.

Exhibit C:

Ack! I mean, I understand that the leather-jacket-over-dress look is trendy now, but this is styled completely wrong. The whole point of this look is for something very "tough" and "edgy" to be paired with something "soft" and "girly". So, if this was what the bride was going for, she should have chosen a more delicate and flowy bridesmaid dress in a lighter shade. This style of dress seems so "heavy" that the leather jacket simply brings it down even more. Also, this look is supposed to seem effortless, so those sleeves should be rolled up in a very haphazard way. I find it strange that the girls each have different jackets - I mean, the girl next to the MOH is wearing one that is way too long and the blonde bridesmaid at the end might actually have one with a hood! It's all so atrocious and overproduced. Not to mention that when you decide to have 10 bridesmaids, you should not have them in identical dresses because your bridal party ends up looking like some sort of weird army. Lastly, I don't even want to get into the bride's leather jacket or her boobilicious laced-up bustier top. Yet, when I look at her bridal party, should I even be surprised?

Overkill.

Get it now?