Oh, Please

Wedding favours. Many people consider it vital to send their guests off with *some* small gift as a token of their appreciation for their participation in the day's joy - and we support. If tasteful and/or practical, wedding favours can be great additions to any home. They don't have to be big or even conventional to be effective: I once received a little olive dish with three associated olive-studded pronged toothpicks, and have more than once put it to good use.

But let's not get confused or side-tracked: wedding favours are, in fact, tokens, aimed, as much as possible, at being gender-neutral, and intended to please the greatest amount of guests present.

Weddings are utilitarian enterprises.

What do we do, then, when, because many of our friends are already married and have young to pre-teenaged children, a considerable slice of the guests at our Big Day are under 12 years old?

Are wedding favours - think DIY kits, candy, or a plethora of plush - for children a good idea, or even acceptable?



Tell us what you think this week.

Many people are going this route, as a recent internet search revealed to me. We think it's kind of any bride to be so considerate of her company that she would go out of her way to ensure that even the miniature people witnessing her next step into adulthood would get some tangible fun out of doing so. But we also think that having wedding favours for children is kind of a little ridiculous. It would be a GREAT thought to tailor the gifts intended for the children in the bridal party - flower girls, ring bearers - to their individual tastes and interests. We support that. But going any further would be both unnecessary and unpleasant for the bride and her chief executive staff of organisers. Besides, how many people would even think to commend you for helping their children collect cavities?

I say all this maybe only because I am accustomed to Italian-North American weddings, which take the word "excess" to disproportionate embarrassment. There, having wedding favours - for the children of 300+ almost always whiny, overly judgmental, and nearly never supportive or satisfied guests - could only turn into a showy (and potentially grotesque) display of wasted energy.

Save the cutesy for the Baptism or Christening, Christians.

We'd love to hear your piece, though, so vote today and have your say. Love it or hate it?

Your votes last week revealed a 66% "need to see more of it" result - we'll try to find other avant-garde bakers to showcase ...