Ever wonder what the guests at your big day REALLY thought of your dress, the reception venue, or the string quartet over-dramatizing every moment of your saunter down the aisle? Welcome to the only online site ballsy enough to out the bad decisions that may land you a divorce. You did? You shouldn't have.
Bride: Alright girls, let's talk dresses. BMs: Ok. Bride: You know what I haven't seen in the past decade and that I think would be a nice throwback to 2000, when Johnny and I met? BMs: No, tell us. Bride: TWO-PIECE DRESSES. BMs: NICE! BM1: I think I might still have mine from prom. Bride: Really? What does it look like?
BM1: Well, it's short, because I was pretty rebellious in those days, and the skirt is like a chiffony thing in sage, but the top is ... wait for it ... TWO-TONED! BM2: Two-toned? Seriously? Was one of them sage? BM1: No! Peach and cream - I was clever like that. BM2: Of course. Bride: How did you keep the continuity with the skirt, then? BM1: I added a little green bow around the waist. It looked nice. Bride: Ok. Done and done. Any dissent from the peanut gallery? BM2: Well, I don't know ... I mean, seriously? Like, sage is not my best colour but I'm willing to live with it. But are two tones even necessary in the bodice? Bride: I'm trying to save us all a little money. Mary already has her dress ... BM2: Ok, ok, fine. BM3: Plus, this way, we get to wear each part over and over again. Like you can just wear the skirt again if you want ... or just the bodice. BM2: Right. That's very likely to happen. BM4: You know what else I was thinking? Bride: What? BM4: If we are going to go with a prom theme, we might as well use organza ribbons to keep the bouquets together.
Bride: Oh my God, I LOVE that idea. You know what really ticks me off, though? BM3: What? Bride: My fiancé's mother is insisting on wearing a spiderweb over her dress. It's gonna ruin all our pictures.
BM3: You can't talk her out of it? Bride: I tried. No luck. BM3: It's ok. At least we'll all look nice.
After months of tireless shopping, Julie had finally found her dream dress. It was pretty, too: high waist, satin sash, light ruffles in a full A-line skirt, simple but classic tube. She had done well, and she knew it. Fernando loved her fiercely and she knew that, too, but what if he broke up with her before the wedding? What if he called it all off at the very last minute because they couldn't decide on a piece of real estate they both liked, or because their parents didn't get along? She had already gone through one devastating breakup of that kind - the worst part was that last time, she'd never even gotten the chance to wear the gown she'd dropped a fortune on.
Well, fuck if she was gonna let that happen a second time: she'd just wear this puppy to her engagement party.
This is a bride. On her wedding day. After wearing a traditional white wedding dress for the first half of the day, she then decided to change into this yellow catastrophe. With a matching heinous hat.
The 2010 Golden Globes' Red Carpet was beyond enjoyable - but not for the fashion. This year, it rained and rained and rained some more, which meant that all the lady celebrities had to not only try and keep their dresses dry, but attempt to look good while posing with/under an umbrella. The horror!
Anyways, here is Kate Hudson doing her thing. Why is she on WB, you ask? Well, she's wearing a wedding dress. And I'm not just saying that because she's in an elaborate white gown. No no. It's ACTUALLY a wedding dress. From the Marchesa Bridal Spring 2010 Collection.
Don't get me wrong. I LOVE me some Marchesa. And the dress is quite beautiful - structural, modern. But, seriously? You're telling me you couldn't find anything to wear that was just as pretty and maybe NOT a wedding dress?
Although, now that I think about it - why not? Why don't we all just start wearing wedding gowns in our everyday life? Throw a party - wear a wedding dress. Attend a cocktail party - wear a wedding dress. Have a business meeting - wear a wedding dress. Let's make this happen.
Lastly, this is the second time Ms. Kate Hudson appears on WB in a wedding dress and not on her wedding day. You think she's hinting at something? Well the first time she was married she wore this bad boy:
This was a winter wedding in Aspen. I get the look she was going for, and she does look great. But this is a very specific look so I understand why she would want to try (and try) again.
So I guess the big question should be : why am I making excuses for Kate Hudson?
CCB: hey, celia, quick question. celia: sure. CCB: so ... french manicures are pretty standard for a bride, yes? celia: yes - but not tacky fake ones. CCB: right ... and, like, professionally done. celia: yes. CCB: OK. But I've also seen bolder brides go fire-engine red full nails. celia: hot. CCB: does that make it okay to have a fire-engine red French manicure?
celia: no. never. in life. CCB: that's what I thought. celia: my eyes. They burn with sorrow. CCB: true story, son.
If there is one thing that upsets me most, it's a bride who insists that she wants to feel "comfortable" on her wedding day.
Personally, I want to feel comfortable when I sleep. For most other daily activities, I usually just tough it out. Which is why I am so confused when brides insist on opting for practical and sensible footwear. Why anyone would want to look "practical" on their wedding day is beyond me. Sure, your wedding may not be the best time to bring out your 5 inch lucite hooker heels, but there is nothing wrong with a cute fashionable peep-toe.
Baring this in mind, I introduce to you the most heinous piece of footwear I have ever laid eyes on :
My soul weeps for the bride who thinks this is OK.
For more options (oh yes. there are options) check out: http://www.thelovelybride.com/all_heel_heights.aspx
I have been a faithful reader for months, so when it came time for me to plan my special day, you, most naturally, were my very first point of reference. I thought I might submit some pictures to you for some feedback on how I did at following "the rules" (but not in a "What not to Wear" kind of way). Would you mind having a look and getting back to me?
Many thanks, Hellenic Bride
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Dear Hellenic Bride,
Many thanks for your faithful readership! celia and I are most glad to critique (constructively) your look. Here goes ...
We see a number of things here. First, an asymetric cut to your gown, a lightly feathered strap with matching rhinestone work in the bodice, and a neutral bouquet - all things we have advocated in recent months. Good work on picking up on these neo-basics and making them yours. We don't know you at all, so we can't say what kind of person you are, but we would have liked to see you go a little bigger with these decisions - a *little* more drama in the strap, for example, would have done the trick.
Permit us to ask: who tailored your gown? We hope you didn't pay them terribly much.
Also, although we commend your decision to stick to a white bouquet, we wonder if you are actually holding asparagus. Is your bouquet made of asparagus? That's kind of what it looks like. I mean, kudos if you were going for originality - edible arrangements are all the rage these days. But, seriously? Asparagus? If you must incorporate it at all, save it for the centerpiece, girl.
A feathered headpiece? NOW we're talking! We love its strategic placement and its coordination (without being matchy-matchy) with the feathered strap. Well-done!
We also appreciate what you've done with your hair. We love a classic side-sweep that does not throw us back to 1994. (Well, to be honest, we love it even then).
In general, Hellenic Bride, it looks like you have opted for the nebulous middle-ground between strictly traditional and flashily contemporary. We think you've done well overall: 85%
Greetings, dear readers ! Everyone at the WB headquarters would like to wish you and yours a very Happy New Year !
To honor our foray into 2010, we thought it would only be appropriate to compile a list of the Top Wedding Looks of the last decade !
(Please note that this list will only consist of celebrity weddings, as our repertoire is still quite limited. Although, check back in 2020 for a list of “Regular Folk” weddings of that decade!)
Ready?
Here we go!
Heather Mills and Paul McCartney (2002)
Ok, so it wasn’t Paul’s finest moment. We still don’t understand why anyone would marry the particular kind of nutjob that is Heather Mills, let alone write a special song to accompany her saunter down the aisle. Still, we must admit that this ecru lace gown of her own design is timeless without being boring, and the first in a long line of full-sleeved, full-laced imitations ever since.Heather’s side-swept up-do is another nice touch.
Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale (2002)
Ah, the benefits of having John Galliano on speed-dial. Gwen Stefani’s jaw dropping custom-made Dior gown shocked many, as a wedding-dress-dipped-in-pink isn’t what one usually finds on a bride. We say: who cares? She took a risk, and it most definitely paid off. While this look isn’t for the Traditional Bride, if Gwen Stefani can’t pull it off, then who can? Although, it probably doesn’t hurt when a hot Brit is waiting for you at the end of that alter.
Christine Baumgartner and Kevin Costner (2004)
Who would have thought that Kevin Costner would ever make it to WB? Well, his wife’s dress was too pretty to resist. Christine Baumgartner was one of the first brides to sport appliqués on the skirt of her wedding gown. For the next six years, bridal designers everywhere have been making their version of her Monique Lhuillier gown. For this, we thank you, Christine. Thank you for being a trendsetter while looking so effortlessly chic! As for that atrocious pick-up, I blame Kevin Costner. I KNOW that was all you, Dances With Wolves.
Camilla Parker-Bowles and Prince Charles (2005)
Camilla Parker-Bowles has taken a lot of fashion heat over
the years, so the world held its breath when it heard she’d become England’s next first lady (so, technically, its second, currently), especially since, let’s face it, how does one do wedding-score without going wedding-snore at sixty years old? WITH DRAMATIC HEADPIECES, THAT’S HOW. Camilla sported two different types on the day of her nuptials, both of which dramatically set off the subtler details of her ensemble more generally – the delicate folds of her chiffon number, and the rich gold brocade in her full-length gown. We tip our hats to these looks.
Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban (2006)
Nicole and Keith have had their fair share of individual upsets – anorexia (undeclared), alcoholism – but a split from Tom Crazy Cruise (or, a stroke of good luck) finally brought the two Aussies together in July of 2006, and neither could have possibly looked any better for the occasion. Kidman ravished and glowed in her empire-waist, tastefully puffy-sleeved, flowy Balenciaga gown, and Urban dazzled with his unconventionally matched three-piece suit (white vest!). God bless The American Dream.
Portia de Rossi and Ellen DeGeneres (2008)
With both brides decked out in Zac Posen, what can possibly go wrong? Yet, we must admit that it’s Portia de Rossi’s gown that stole the show. Even with its plunging neckline and backless cut, this dress still manages to look classic, chic and understated. And that touch of pink tulle adds just enough “wow factor” to make this dress one of the most memorable wedding looks we’ve seen in awhile.
Jenna Dewan and Channing Tatum (2009)
Jenna Dewan looked like a fairy princess on her wedding day. Her peach and ivory Reem Acra wedding gown is as light as air. Although the “princess” look is overdone and sometimes unintentionally tacky, this bride has pulled it off by still looking modern thanks to the unique texture of her dress’s skirt. Gorgeous.
